Out of Sight Out of Mind

“you soon forget people or things that are no longer visible or present.”

That is what you’ll find if you Google the title. A theory that proves true in almost every circumstance but when theirs Love involved it’s no excuse.

For too long I found this idea, this thought to be stronger than my own will to make sure my person felt loved, appreciated, and reminded of what they were to me. When I wasn’t home with my person I embodied out of sight out of mind, completely falling off and not fulfilling my promises and obligations to my relationship. When confronted, a small amount of resentment began to build. My excuses felt more reasonable and understandable than what they were “complaining” about. Not even attempting to step into their shoes and feel what they felt. My efforts to try and do better were met with the same pitiful ending, me not actually trying. A cycle that I could never break. A cycle that was disheartening to my partners outlook on the relationship.

Like most of us, you’ve probably spent 5, 10, or even 30 minutes scrolling thru social media mindlessly. In that same amount of time, we could simply swipe over to our contacts, click favorites (that’s where they should be), and call our person and check in on them. Hear their voice. Reminding them why they're loved. Why you fell for them. Let them know they’re missed and that you can’t wait to be in their arms again. Strive to be proactive, not reactive.

If you’re someone like me who has struggled in the past, look for ways to make it easier on yourself. Set alarms and reminders. Find an app that will do just that if the ones you have now aren’t working for you. No matter what you do, do something. Make an effort to make an effort.

Those 5, or 10 minutes might be what saves your relationship. If you’re reading this it’s not too late. It’s not too late to change. It’s not too late to love. It’s not too late to pick up the phone.

Relationships aren’t easy and will require effort, which doesn’t mean it isn’t for you or that your person is being unreasonable. One day your partners presence will feel normal and you might become complacent. Always remember “Her presence is a gift.".